What Should You Do When You Hear The Words "Can I Smell Your Hair?
People love to smell -and feel- hair. Many don't like to admit it, but they do.
And when your hair smells like a rich and creamy combination of dark beer, mahogany, caramel, and spices... Well, you could start hearing questions you'd never had to field before.
That's just the price you pay, when your hair turns heads.
Since we at Duffy's Brew are civic-minded folks and aware of the potential here for social mishaps or even outright faux pas, we thought we'd put together a quick and easy guide to...
When They Should Or Should Not Smell Your Hair
(Even When It Smells Really Really Really Ridiculously Good)
1 - At a supposedly trendy after-party.
If you like what you see, go for it. Just remember, though, you can't actually care about your hair. But that's one of the great things about a beer-based Duffy's product: plausible deniability!
Your carefully-coiffed bed-head can be enhanced with even greater ambiguity through the addition of a great little microbrew.
"Is that deliberate?
Who soaks their head in beer?
Is this a new Thing?
But why does it smell so good?"
Suggested line: When they ask if they can sniff, give them the best "sure, whatev" you've got. Cultivate that air of mystery!
2 - In the office.
First off, never ever be the one to ask this in the office. It's a lawsuit waiting to happen. But if the irresistible allure of dark sudsy brew with hints of berry inspires a co-worker to risk a workplace harassment suit, it's probably easiest to let them have their whiff.
Just be sure to share - it shows you're not playing favorites. When it's Duffy's Brew in your hair, there's plenty to go around!
Suggested line: None.
3 - In prison.
No. Just no. Not a good idea.
On the other hand, if you can get in good with the kitchen staff, a few common ingredients plus their prison-issued "hair products" can yield a homebrew brew-shampoo which could give you the best-smelling cellblock in the joint.
So there's that at least.
4 - During a zombie outbreak.
Almost certainly not. There's too much chance that this situation could go from smelling, to feeling, to nibbling, to ohmyGODITSEATINGMEEEeeee-
And, likewise, if you think that sexy shambler is simply overwhelmed by the scent of those graaaaaiiiinnnnns in your awesome beer-based conditioner, well, that's probably not quite the message that's being sent. Have your backup give a second opinion... before it's too late.
Suggested line: "Hey, do you know a good safehouse?"
5 - When abducted by aliens.
This is a tricky situation. Depending on the species, this could be anything from a handshake, to foreplay, to initiation of ritual combat... to even mere curiosity.
Such is the power of Duffy's Brew.
Context is key here. Examine your surroundings, and anything it's holding or wearing, to determine your situation. Is it bearing teeth/fangs/shards/bones or other potentially-threatening implements? Are those medical devices? Is it making other attempts to communicate? Is there a towel nearby you can wrap around your head?
Suggested line: It's totally your call, but if things seem OK, we suggest "You can smell mine if I can smell yours." Think reciprocity. Make friends, not enemies.
It Can Be Hard, Having Great Hair...
And as a wise man said: With great power comes great responsibility. When your hair smells really amazing, you need grace and social skills to accompany that fine shine and can-I-touch-it body.
Then, you'll know what to do when someone whispers softly in your ear... "Can I smell your hair?"
(Duffy's Brew encourages you to use your hyperbolic hair-powers responsibly.)